Why saying “be happy” is not always the answer
Why saying “be happy” is not always the answer
Encouragement not necessarily a good thing
Encouragement not necessarily a good thing
Has anybody been told to be happy when you are feeling sad?
Please be happy!
I am an anxious person by nature and from a clinical standpoint. I am also an overly positive person at the same time. Sounds contradictive, right?. Well, that is what I am. I always positively see things, but at the same time in the back of my head, there is just a thing that makes me anxious.
I give you a situation I sometimes encountered. You might in the position where everything just feels wrong, or whatever scenario play in your head is the worst-case scenario. The feeling pulls you down, and you wish to stay at the ‘sad’ phase. It could happen just by a spur of a moment. However, for me, it often only occurs when there is external conditions arise because my positive and negative thinking traits are balancing things out.
When I am in this ‘sad’ phase, my mind just wants to think about the wrong things, and my body needs to be in the rest mode. While in this condition, have you been meet someone who says “Please cheers up!” or “Be happy” or even “Just think about the good things, there are many worst things out there”?.
Why it is a problem?
The problem is, at least for me, this just like someone popping out a balloon with a needle; everything burst up. I know there are things way worst than my condition and matters would get better, but at that moment, the emotion I feel is as real it can be. Just because there is a worse thing out there doesn’t mean that the feeling I have could be invalidated.
When you are feeling sad and told to be happy, it is like forcing you out from a room with violence; it would not end up good. My sadness needs to be processed well after all before any other thing could get in, including happy things.
In a moment like this, it is better to have a calm and silent moment. Let the moment and feeling proceed on. With each second passed by, things would calm down by itself. Happy, sad, disappointment, etc., all kinds of emotion would not last forever.
In the end, it might not apply to everyone, but this is my own experience with my headspace. I just want to share my emotion and how I am coping with it.
